How to approach your crush

Have you ever been in a situation where you were crushing hard on someone but were too shy to approach them? It’s even harder for girls because we’re always told that guys are the ones who need to do the chasing. What happens if he doesn’t approach you; does that mean he’s not interested?

When it comes to crushes, you could find yourself in a situation where your crush is just as shy as you are. Maybe he is worried about saying the wrong thing when approaching you, or maybe he thinks you’re not interested. Well, chomas, here are some tips to remember when you want to get closer to your crush.

Find things in common you can talk about

Whether your crush is your neighbour, classmate or friend’s cousin’s friend, there must be something the two of you have in common that you can talk to him about. Maybe you share similar hobbies, music interests or cultures. If you know what they like (and know that you’re interested in the same thing) it will be easier to hold a conversation.

Pick the right time to speak to them

When the opportunity arises for you to talk to them just strike up a conversation. If they are happy to talk to you then great, the two of you can take it from there. If they seem uninterested then that’s okay, at least you got the courage to speak to them! If they seem interested, exchange numbers or invite them to hang out some time.

Be honest

When talking to your crush, don’t pretend to be who you’re not. If the person really is for you, then they should like you for you. Also be honest about your feelings. There’s nothing wrong with being the first one to say it. Waiting for a guy to approach you is so old fashioned. Even as a young woman, there is nothing wrong with you making the first move. The worst that could happen is finding out that he is not interested. And if that is the case, isn’t it better to know now than wasting all that time longing to be with someone, right?

So the next time you see your crush, pluck up the courage to go over to them. Even if it’s just to say “hi”. Sometimes baby steps work too. Good luck choma!

Did you find this article helpful? Yes Yes No No Thank you for your feedback choma!

Let’s be honest about this. We all have found ourselves time and again trying to approach a person whom we saw someplace but never had the slightest clue how to go about it. Just the thought of initiating a conversation feels like being nominated for the “ice-bucket challenge” on a social platform. Your heart begins to beat rapidly, palms begin to sweat and your tongue feels all rolled up inside your stomach. Been there, done that.

How to approach your crush

Now, I am not going to make it sound more difficult than you assume it to be. Yes, talking to your crush/stranger can be really hard. But again, if you do it right, you can start looking forward to that first date.


Our fear of rejection is our worst enemy. The fact being, if you approach someone, he or she won’t start screaming or run with their hands up in the air. Neither will they make fun of you or turn into a mythical beast unleashed from hell. If this is the case with you, take a chill pill and relax because you’ve got it all wrong. Just like animals can smell fear, one can make out whether the other person is confident or not. Your fear would leave a very sour first impression. Making the first move is one of the ways one can come across as confident.

How to approach your crush

2. Pep Talk

Back in school, my football coach used to say this one thing all the time, “The best offence is a good defense”. So, practice and try visualizing the actual conversation. It’s better to be prepared than to be all dumbstruck when you ask your crush for their e-mail or their phone number. Try visualizing what she might say or objections she might have. This would help you rev up your game.

3. Don’t enter the “Friend zone”

I can’t lay enough stress on this. Get out of your comfort zone. If you act all shy and innocent, they’ll automatically “Friend Zone” you. Approach your crush with confidence, and never try to conceal the fact that you are approaching him/her for a date.

4. Test Match. Not a T-20

This is the most important part. Most people blow off whatever chance they have by galloping into things. Remember, it’s a test match not a 20-20. Wait for your second innings. Don’t go on asking questions like “Do you have a boyfriend?” From my perspective, don’t even ask them out on a date.

99 out of 100 times people ignore the Golden Rule. The longer you talk to your crush, the chances of you blowing it off increase. Keep the first conversation short. You should focus on making them curious about you and not come across as a sad puppy looking for a new home.

5. Don’t Overdo It

There is a thin line between coming across as flirty or creepy. Don’t go throwing yourself at you crush. You should be able to distinguish between having a crush on someone and being obsessed with them. Avoid leaving an impression that makes the other one feel as if you are clinging onto them. We don’t want them thinking that you are ready to eat away from the palm of their hand.


So, you followed all of the above. You feel confident and even spent a few extra minutes in the shower. But, what things one must keep in mind while having the actual conversation? Don’t you worry, here’s a list of things that’ll help you to sail smoothly through that first conversation.

  • Maintain eye contact. Your eyes are the window to your soul. Look them in the eye when you talk to them and maintain a smile at all times. But remember it is impolite stare.
  • Dress up. You don’t have to imitate James bond or Halle Berry for that matter, but you do need to follow some basic principles of grooming yourself. Look like a person who has his/her act together
  • Check their body language. Now there’s no particular way to do this but there are certain signs which can tell you whether the person is interested in you or not. If not, Respect their privacy. Otherwise you’ll end up finding a restraining order in your mail.
  • Be respectful. This is a must if you plan to approach someone in public or otherwise.
  • No matter what the outcome, put yourself in a position where you don’t care whether your crush likes you back or not. This’ll help you deal with rejection which you might have to face.

Now that you know all the golden rules, put that confident face on and Go Get Them Tiger! Hope this Friendship Day turn out to be the most promising one for you!

Crushes are for everyone and have no age limit. You are never too old to develop a crush on someone and whether you are in high school crushing on someone or a full grown adult, the feelings are always the same.

This is usually how the whole scenario plays out: You meet someone you find extremely attractive- only this is not the usual “Oh my gosh, he’s (or she) so hot” thing where you acknowledge their hotness and then move on. No, this is more. Suddenly, you catch yourself thinking about this person constantly, having a hard time focusing on work and your day to day routines. You lose your appetite, have constant butterflies in your chest and stomach , listen to corny love songs and well- actually feel kind of ill, but in the most wonderful way! If this sounds familiar and you can relate, then congratulations- you have a crush on someone!

How to approach your crush

Crushes bring so much joy into our lives. They make us feel young, alive and take our minds to the most amazing, magical places. At the same time, crushes can also be very distracting and scary. Most crushes are discreet, a sacred experience we go through alone, wondering if this person feels the same way or even knows you are alive. You want so much to get closer to him or her, but are terrified of the possible outcome (rejection hurts, after all). So, how should you approach a crush?

It can be nerve-racking, but it is important that you deal with your feelings and approach your crush. It’ll bring you relief and of course you will also have the opportunity to find out how he or she feels. What’s the worst thing that can happen? At the very worst, he or she will not feel mutually, you will go from having a crush to feeling crushed, but you will move on (even if you think you won’t). At the very best, you will find out he or feels the same and has been too afraid to approach you too! Believe it or not, it’s worse not approaching your crush, because you will forever be wondering, torturing yourself day in and day out with daydreams and playing things out in your head, when you could just gather some courage and just go for it!

The rise in popularity of dating apps has significantly reduced the pressure that used to placed on only meeting people IRL. But, as a result, some folks have become much worse at flirting with people in person. What happens when you really want to talk to that cutie in front of you in line at the coffee shop? Or the really stylish person holding your favorite book, sitting across from you at the bar? Never fear, internet fiends: There are still numerous ways to learn how to talk to your crush in real life, as opposed to just swiping right.

There’s good news — if your crush already likes you back, all you need is an icebreaker to get the conversation started. Even if your casual chat at a bar about what your crush is reading doesn’t lead to a date, you should be proud of yourself solely for taking the risk! Keep in mind that just because someone doesn’t pick up a conversation, doesn’t necessarily mean that they are personally rejecting you.

I asked dating coach Erika Ettin to provide readers with tips for confidently approaching someone in person. Her advice is sure to help you strike up a conversation with someone swoon-worthy.

Ettin’s main tip when it comes to approaching people is to ask a question that is relevant to the situation. She explains, "If you’re in line at a coffee shop, for example, ask the person, ‘Is the salted caramel hot chocolate good? I’ve never had it.’ Talking about something related to your setting makes for smoother transition." When you think about it, this makes complete sense — if you start with, "So where are you from?" when in line at the grocery store, the person you’re directing the question at will likely not answer.

When it comes to conversation starters, sometimes the more trivial a sentence sounds, the more effective it is.

While this may seem like a no brainer, Ettin encourages people to avoid corny pick up lines. Although they can sometimes be effective, more often than not they can lead to awkward conversations. Pick up lines can also be interpreted as insincere, because they are so widely syndicated. Some people might not take them seriously because it can seem as if you did not care enough to come up with something original.

Going from not talking to someone, to saying something like, "Did it hurt when you fell from the sky?" will likely make your crush feel like you’re not serious about getting to know them.

In the era of pre-internet dating, clinical psychologist and professor, Dr. Chris L. Kleinke conducted a study that explored different forms of approach one can use when talking to a stranger. Psychology Today notes that overall, the research revealed that both men and women think pickup lines are the least effective way to ask someone out. Even if you can’t come up with a relevant question, retire your one-liners in favor of a simple one-word greeting.

Another way to transition into a conversation with someone cute is by taking into account your surroundings. If you’re at a bar or a party with a lot of people, start talking to those around you — even if you’re not interested in them romantically. Once you get used to talking to new people who you’re not attracted to, you may feel less nervous about approaching your crush.

"By the time you get to the person you like, you’re 1) warmed up, and 2) just seem like the friendly person who talks to everyone," Ettin says. An even better version of this trick is to start by talking to the person of interest’s friends. That way, they might organically join in the conversation all on their own.

Beware of hovering — it has the potential to seriously freak people out. Ettin explains that lurking or creeping can make a person uncomfortable. Most people can sense when a person is silently hovering near them, and they can take it as a signal to move far, far away. Even if you don’t mean to be creepy, you never want to make someone feel unsafe.

On a related note, be sure to pay attention to what this person is doing. Do they seem like they want to be alone? For example, if your crush is the barista at a cafe, keep in mind that they are working and are most likely extremely busy. If they seem open to talking, you can consider striking up a conversation, but be sure to respect their personal space.

The struggle to approach people in public is so real. Ettin suggests trying an exercise she does with clients. She explains: "My client has to ask me questions, and I can only answer and not ask questions back. That way, the client has to be on his or her toes."

This is totally something that a willing friend could practice with you. She goes on to say, "I also practice casual hugging with my clients (nothing worse than a bad hug)." In this case, I guess practice really can make perfect!

Remember that as long as you’re respectful, it’s unlikely that you’ll be judged for innocently introducing yourself to someone. "It can be difficult to approach a stranger and start a conversation," Ettin explains. "Just remember that no one can shame you for trying, even if you don’t get the response you’re looking for." Treat every encounter as a learning experience!

Keep in mind that the very person you’re so nervous to talk to might be feeling the exact same way about approaching you! So many people struggle with shyness, and talking to strangers can be so difficult. Be kind to yourself, know that you have a lot to offer. The next time you see a cutie in public — put your new skills to the test. There’s no shame in taking a risk!

Check out the entire Gen Why series and other videos on Facebook and the Bustle app across Apple TV, Roku, and Amazon Fire TV.

Check out the “Best of Elite Daily” stream in the Bustle App for more stories just like this!

How to approach your crush

Okay n00bs, I shall do my best in explaining all the wisdom I have learned from all the guys I approached. Yes, I’m a pc/video gamer but not only do I have mad skillz in gaming (unless it’s certain ones 😛). I have mad skillz when it comes to approaching dudes I want to get to know. My success rate is at 100% which is why I’ll explain how I did that.

How to approach your crush

Size up your target!

Once you have spotted the person you want to get to know and might start a relationship with in the future. You need to be able to tell what chance do you have at succeeding with them. Never randomly walk up to the person because you won’t have enough info to go on. First: You analyze/observe what kind of person they might be. Second: Think about the environment you’re both in and if it’s a place that tells you if y’all have something in common. Third: Look how they dress because that will also tell you if you might succeed. Fourth: In this case looks matter more. The reason why they matter more is because you haven’t talked to them yet. So you can’t go by their personality just yet, and looks can tell a lot about how things will work out.

Always go with your gut feeling

The second you become interested in talking to them, start planning on your approach (refer too size up your target). This part is where I know a lot of people tend to talk themselves out of making an attempt which is how you screw yourself over. If I had changed my mind and chickened out when I first talked to my boyfriend. We would never have gotten together and I wouldn’t be in the greatest relationship I have ever been in for over 4 years now.

Never think!

Once you have done all the stuff I listed above, you have now advanced to the next stage. Walking up to them and talking! Though when you start to think, that can turn into your worse enemy. Most people will start to freak out, have a mini panic attack, and short circuit the second they can say hi. Try as hard as you can to turn your brain off as much as possible and say only what first comes to mind and natural. The key is to go with the flow and don’t stop to think. AT ALL, other wise you end up like this picture below.

How to approach your crush

Breaking the ice!

Now that you have stopped thinking, it’s time to say hi and start a conversation! I know what y’all are thinking and panicking about.

How do I even start a conversation?

I don’t know what subject to talk about!


Remember the, no thinking rule I had just finished talking about! Then remember back to, “size up your target,” since doing that will help you know what to start the conversation about. Either by something they’re wearing, looking at, the place y’all are in, etc. If someone is reading a book, polity get their attention and ask them about it. Show your interest in the book and all they explain about it. Build the whole conversation about it and then see if you can branch off more conversations from that. If they’re wearing something cool but different talk about that.

The key to all of this is to show pure and innocent curiosity about the topic you start with. Like a little kid innocent type curiosity but don’t act like a little kid yourself. Even if you end up going with, “Hi, I’m sorry if i’m interrupting anything. It’s just that I honestly want to get to know you since you seem like a very interesting person.” Say that in a very sweet and innocent curious way so you don’t come off as creepy. If they say no then smile and say alright and walk away. Who knows it might make the person stop you and actually talk more to you. So what have we learned? INNOCENT CURIOSITY IS KEY!

Look them in the eyes

I don’t mean like this.

I mean like normal eye contact that you do with family and friends. Which I know with someone you like and trying to get to know. It could turn out like these 2.

DON’T PANIC! Remind yourself that you’re doing awesome and to keep eye contact without being creepy.

End goal!

After following all those steps (even adding in your own spice to it), if all goes well then you have succeeded in approaching! Congratulations for passing the first time approaching!

How to approach your crush

The good news is after the first approach it becomes easier and less nerve-racking. Until you confess your feelings to them, yes that nervousness all comes back but trust me it’s worth it! Plus that’s another step for another day. 🙂

I hope this myTake helps a lot of people that have trouble approaching someone you like. Also let me know about your experiences with approaching someone and how did it go?

How to approach your crush? Even the best of the best playboys have a difficult time to pull off this fear factor task.

I know we have all had our super awkward moments in front of our crush. The first instinct anyone has is to run away and hide. And you know what’s even funnier?

When all of this is happening to someone else, we advise them like a smartass but when it happens to us, we forget all those advice.

Anyways, let me be a smartass now and give you 7 points on how to approach your crush?

1. Find Common Ground

How to approach your crush

First thing’s first, do a little research. Find a little bit about them as in what they like to do, their hobbies or their favorite food, anything.

Believe me, you can find all of this by a just little bit of stalking on their social media. It’s no shocker to anyone how much people can tell about themselves on social media.

2. Do Not Plan a Coffee Date

How to approach your crush

I feel like coffee dates are the worst way to get to know someone for the first time. It’s like if you hate someone after one sip of coffee, you can’t just get up and leave, that would be straight ass rude.

So maybe diversify a little, go for a movie instead so if you didn’t meet your expectations, at least the movie will keep you entertained.

This is not actually a technique on how to approach your crush? But how to plan a date so you don’t get disappointed.

3. Think Before You Talk

How to approach your crush

Like I mentioned before, your brain stops working in front of your crush and you forget every advice of your friends.

So there is a good chance that you’ll say something stupid. Better think twice before you say anything.

4. Be Confident

How to approach your crush

It’s the key to getting almost anything you want. Even if you are an introvert, it does not make you any less confident.

If you’re not confident you’ll seem like you’re scared or too shy, they’ll automatically slip you into the friend zone (and no one wants that, right?)

5. Relax Beforehand

How to approach your crush

Do something that relaxes you before you go and approach your crush because if you hype it, there is a good chance that you’d screw up.

So maybe listen to your favorite, eat your comfort food or even take a nap, whatever relaxes you the best.

6. DO NOT Be Extra

How to approach your crush

There is no bigger spoiler than someone trying too hard. Don’t agree with everything they say just so they will like you. Don’t say or do things that you wouldn’t normally do just to impress them.

The entire goal here is to make them like you for who you are so don’t be too gullible. Don’t lose yourself during the process.

7. Be Positive

How to approach your crush

It is all going to workout, it always does. And never think that you’re not good enough for them or they are out of your league, No! People can be different, they might have different likes and dislikes but no one is out of your league.

Remember, you are the best version of yourself and this will help you achieve anything.

Just like the saying goes ‘agar tum kisi ko shiddat se chaho….bla bla…”.

But you get the point right? So just keep all these points in mind and go approach your crush, Like a boss!

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Sharing your feelings is often very stressful, because you then find out what the other person thinks about you. There is always a risk that the other will not feel the same way.

If the mere thought of talking to your crush scares or even paralyses you, no worries – you do not have to do anything about it. Expressing your feelings of infatuation or liking is not mandatory.

If you want to find out what kind of feelings your crush has for you, you can do so by expressing your own feelings. A negative answer is always possible, of course, and then the decision of the other must be respected: no means no. It also means that maybe you were not meant to be together, but the same approach might work with someone else.

Remember, there are no gender roles in taking initiatives and expressing your feelings!

Getting to know each other begins gradually

There is no single and right way to get to know one another. The initial stages often progress gradually.

If you do not have very direct contact, you have to consider how to get closer. If you have direct contact and courage, talk, tell about yourself, and show your interest in the other person.

If your approach is appreciated, continue. If not, respect this and do not argue it. It does not help your case.

Pick-up lines may work, but really cheesy and worn-out attempts are likely to do quite poorly. Try to come up with something unique that describes your personality, and that you feel is a good and natural way to approach. Usually other people do not pay as much attention to shyness and insecurity as you feel yourself. Some appreciate a more cautious approach, some appreciate a more direct approach – but few appreciate a rude approach.

Humour, ease and cheerfulness can be the things that attract people’s interest. Some like rough humour, some think it is just lame and tasteless.

Do not try to put yourself on a pedestal by walking over others, calling names, or mocking. It may paint a nasty picture of you as a bully.

If you attend the same school, there are several good moments to get acquainted:

  • If you know someone in their group of friends, maybe you can increase your contact with them. Chatting is natural in a larger group.
  • You can seek their presence at school. Sit next to them in class, join the same team during gym, or approach them during lunch. You can even sit at the same table and seek eye contact. If your gaze is responded to and you get a smile, you have probably got their attention.
  • After you have exchanged a word or two with them, it is more natural to greet each other. It facilitates the transit to chatting level.
  • Eye contact and smile are effective non-verbal communication – Explore how they respond to your gaze and expression.

It may be easier to find people with similar interests or same sexual orientation online. On the other hand, on the internet, people may also paint a picture of themselves that does not correspond to reality, which over time may cause a feeling of being cheated or deceived.

If you know them through social media, you can get their attention by reacting to their social media posts:

How to approach your crush

We will all have a crush at some point in our lives. For some people, it can be easy to approach your crush but for others, it is more difficult. All it takes is 3 seconds to simply approach your crush that you have been wanting to talk to. Let us show you how to impress your girl in just 3 seconds. What are you waiting for?

When we like someone whether it is a girl or a boy, it can be hard to push ourselves to talk to them and start a conversation with them. But there is one simple rule you can apply to your life that enables you to talk to them without any trouble.

The 3 Second Rule is simple. You give yourself 3 seconds upon spotting your crush to approach them. Giving yourself only 3 seconds stops you from overthinking what to say and it also stops your brain from nervousness setting in.

We all have had those moments. Thinking about all the thoughts that ran through your mind as you hesitated to talk to your crush.

“What should I say first?”

“Do I introduce myself or ask a question?”

“What if I mumble while talking to them?”

“Is this the right time?”

These are excuses that we often tell ourselves. With the 3 second rule, you wouldn’t have enough time to overthink and miss your chance. After you do go and approach your crush and successfully talk to them, you’re going to be incredibly proud of yourself.

So, you’ve approached your crush but you don’t know what to say. Let’s talk about key things you need to remember:

  1. Put your phone away – no distractions
  2. Ask open-ended questions – don’t be egocentric
  3. Actively listen even though you don’t enjoy the topic – show you care, please
  4. Be enthusiastic

Here are examples of conversation starters you can use.

  1. Base it on the location – discuss your surrounding
    1. Have you recently visited any cool spots nearby?
    1. Food – we all love it
      1. What type of cuisine do you go to?
      2. What’s the worst thing you’ve ever eaten?

      How to Know When a Girl Truly Loves You.

      • She will share her secrets with you
      • She will blindly trust you
      • She will be possessively not jealous
      • She will always come to you for help
      • She will not care about your financial status

      She’s pretending like she doesn’t miss you, you’re pretending you don’t give a damn, ego is a hell of a drug .


      I’m stuck between “I really wanna talk to you,” and “I really need to get over you.”

      There’s not much else to say! Sometimes in life, you just have to send it. Like Nike said JUST DO IT!

      If you really like that certain individual, you might as well tell them because you don’t know what can happen tomorrow or whether you will see them again,